Thursday 20 November 2014

Recycling Old People Parts

Off to the knacker's yard for ya.

About half of Britain’s 260 crematoriums have been participating in a scheme (some call them programs but we like to sound shifty) to recycle steel hips, plates, gold teeth and screws that are collected after cremation and sold on with the money raised going to charity.

The Dutch company makes use of the 75 tonnes a year of people junk selling it on to be made into car parts, airplane parts, road signs and household objects. Of course the loved ones are asked to sign a consent form allowing them to do so.

One family who were interested to know if a bullet had been found in their WWII hero father were handed a 1 LBS bag of metal as their father had stepped on a mine and still had shrapnel in his leg. Try scattering those ashes.

It would probably be a little cuntish and disrespectful to not tell the relatives huh?


Welcome to Northern Ireland where cuntishness is the norm and we don't do no respect.

Roselawn Crematorium in Belfast says 'fuck yer dead ... it's time to move on anyways' and have done 11,000 cremations since the scheme started in 2010 and have not mentioned going through loved ones ashes for metal bits.


I bet they didn't use magnets and tongs like they say they do but sifted old uncle Bob using a riddle.

Belfast council said: “It is not deemed necessary to provide this information and no family has ever requested it. However, we keep this under review.”

Uh yeah we also put half of yer granny into the grinder for dog food but since you never asked we didn't think it worth telling you about. 

The National Association of Funeral Directors didn't even know the scheme was happening in Belfast. As well as cuntishness there is also a high level of incompetence throughout this tagnut on the arse of the UK Province.

The city council had not even listed a charity for the 2 tonnes of scrap metal money to go to so instead of local charities that money was divided around other UK charities .... like I said, incompetence.

I also don't like the way they just say, 'oh it goes to charity' charity is not a place nor is it a proper answer. If it went to that Belfast charity that drives mini vans around to get drunk people safely home at night I'd say go fuck off, if they can drink they can get a taxi.   

Recycling people parts is a great idea, have you bought any jewelry since 2010? It might have some gold teeth melted into it or when you make a cup of tea you might be putting someone you know on the boil.

I bet a lot of the ashes you get back are from half the town who have died, people all come out the same. I wonder if they have a set weight to give to people and the rest gets sold as cat litter or something.
I guess it pays to ask a load of questions so some cunt doesn't say, 'well no one asked.'

Yet again another example of how the Nazis were ahead of their time. The ever growing population and dwindling resources I think it's always best to ask what is in the mystery meat yer eating ... aw fuck it, just pass the red sass, as if that would put me off.  


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