Nigel Farage Only Answers To Nigel Farage

Dear Ukip, it is with great regret that I find I must resign as the leader of the party. I feel I've let you down even though we got 3.9 million fucking votes but I don't want Ukip to be seen as the Nigel Farage party whose only policy is to stop wogs taking our British jobs. I wish you great success in the future, love Nigel.

Dear Nigel, you had me at leader. I can't accept my er your resignation because you are just so fucking kewl. If we keep getting the mindless rabble stirred up I can see you as the next Prime Minister, maybe the emperor of Europe.

Lets keep sticking it to the wogs and lets keep making racist and sexist comments because it doesn't make us bigoted, it makes us er colourful and eccentric .... is Caucasian a colour as that is the only colourful I approve of?

I'm going to tear up your resignation so go put your feet up, smoke a fag and have a few dozen drinks, you've earned it mate.

This is how Nigel Farage's resignation from Ukip went after he lost the general election in the UK. He doesn't know what e-mails or texting are since he is a time traveler from the 1980's. Look out in 5 years time when Ukip is re-branded the Nigel Farage Experience, he also runs the Nigel Farage fan club and can be seen at Nazicon 2015 in June.